Yesterday I was supposed to bring Crockpot Mac & Cheese to a pot luck for work…but I forgot.
The day before we we’re supposed to hang out but I had to cancel last minute…because I forgot.
Oh, I’ve told you that story before? I don’t remember telling you.. I must have forgotten.
and I’m so sorry that I forgot.
Because I used to NEVER forget. I was always on time, always prepared and I was thoughtful- because I remembered.
But now I forget.
Forget to pack lunches, to feed myself, to clean, to pick up groceries.
There are some things that I could never forget though.
That Sean is dead, leaving me here with two children.
The smell of his dead, preserved body.
The blackened, necrotic wound in the side of his head, the bruising around his eye and cheek.
The last words I ever spoke to him, angry words.
Things I wish I could forget.
So, please be patient with me, I probably will continue to forget for quite some time, because a new baby and a dead husband have thrown what was left of my brain into a blender and turned it on high.