Identity Crisis

The other day I was talking to my sister on the phone and she commented that I sound different.

“I feel different” I responded.

I couldn’t quite figure out why I had felt different when just the week before I was drinking almost every night, not sleeping or eating well and feeling overwhelmingly bleck.

This week I only had two glasses of wine, went for multiple walks with Luke and Gwen, got a pedicure, got my hair cut and colored and bought some new postpartum clothes for when I return to work.

But it wasn’t just the exercise, or the hair or the clothes that made me feel different.

I realized mid-conversation I myself was different.

I no longer felt like Sean’s wife.

Not that I solely was defined by being a wife or mother, but when a woman becomes those things, they become a pivotal  part of her identity.

I never thought that I’d have to lose you to help me find myself again.