To My Children

To My Children,

I’m so sorry.

I’m so sorry that I chose a father that would leave you when you were so young leaving you without the loving, hard-working and supportive father you once had.

I’m so sorry that he won’t be there to cheer you on at your sporting events, teach you all that he knew, see you graduate or watch you get married…that he’ll never know the children you will have one day.

I’m so sorry, because there will come a time when something wonderful happens and you will want to tell your daddy. But instead of calling him on the phone or coming to our home to share your news, you will go to the cemetary and talk to his cremated remains encased in stone.

I’m so sorry, because that at times I will not be enough for you. No matter how I try, I am only one person with two hands and I can never truly be both mom AND dad. Some days I will not be the happy, devoted and energetic mother you deserve.

I’m so sorry that this horrible tragedy has robbed you both of your innocence far too soon. I would give anything in the world to take the pain, anger and confusion away from you.

But I can’t- and I’m so sorry.